Month: March 2023

Elvas

Last weekend, I did another grandfather ceremony with the people that I by now consider to be my shamanistic family.

After two cups of medicine, sitting at the sacret fire, under a remarkable star sky, we were asked to share our experience this far.

I became the third person to talk.

“Sacred fire, wow, it’s so beautiful to sit here with all of these beautiful people. I came here 11 months ago, to this beautiful land, and I’ve been in healing work for more than 25 years now, but since I arrived my healing and psychospiritual development skyrocketed. All the synchronicities that are happening ever since, wow, it’s unbelievable, like magic.

I’m really truly grateful to Phara and Yves and the people of the Temple of the Earth. To me, it seems like with every ceremony, I enter the next level of healing and consciousness.

So, each month I go back to Vienna for a weekend to see my daughter and tune into that sick Babylon-frequency of the West. And actually, I start to enjoy it tuning into this sick frequency for a few hours because it lets me enjoy how healthy it is here in South Portugal.

And as I have experienced so much extreme racism in my life and in Austria again the last time I went there. But now that Austria is not my home any longer, I no longer identify with it. My home is here now. I love it. It is like a paradise here. And I am now entering the next stage of my life.

And as for my name, my Persian name is Khashayar but nobody could pronounce it back in Austria, or didn‘t care to pronounce it, so when I went to highschool I used my Greek name Xerxes as my name but at Boom festival it was reveald to me that the name for this stage of my life is supposed to be my Hebrew name, Ahasveros and there I had my water-baptism in the lake of Boom and here I ask for the fire baptism by the sacred fire.”

I threw the flowers into the fire and the fire confirmed my request.

“But as Ahasveros is hard to spell like my other names, I decided people to call me Ahash… a Hebrew man told me, that it means “snake”. The snake is fitting me, it reminds me to carefully use my tongue, so my words are medicine, not poison – as often.”

The next day, I came to my sister’s land to meet her and our family for Noruz. We have such a beautiful time here and only my daughter and her mother are missing for our celebrations. But in the ceremony, it was revealed to me that my daughter will come to live with or near me here in Portugal.

What a year comes to an end. I moved to Portugal. Along the way I found the Ring that I have been looking for 20 Year. It’s smith told me that it’s stone would change my life… and it and these ceremonies with the Temple of the Earth did.

I’ve lived in different communities, first in Essencia and then with the Persians but eventually I realized, it’s not the time anymore to serve other people‘s interests but follow my own path and vision with which I will serve so much more people. And yesterday the owner of the land of Cristaland proposed to me to become the leader of the community. Cristaland is perhaps one of the three most well known communities in the south.

And also, Boom Festival invited me to perform twice on their healing stages. For those who don’t know what that is or means… in my previous life it’s comparable to having a speach at TED… not TEDx 😉

So, yeah, my life is and last year was Rock’n’Roll. Since I left Austria eleven months ago for an exploration tour to Portugal, after 43 years I finally decided to leave Austria for good and move to a new country, changed my career back to what it was when I originally started this blog 17 years ago and have a new name.

Ahasveros

Cristaland

Three years ago on this day, when I arrived in Vienna, I heard the news that Covid was declared a pandemic.

For many people, this day has eventually become a defining moment of their life.

Certainly, it has for me and my daughter.

Coincidently, just a few hours before the pandemic was declared, I had left her grandmother’s home in Corinthia eventually leading to the separation from my child’s mother. Originally,she wanted to stay there for the moment – the first lockdown. For the moment became forever.

My daughter is certainly not the first neither will be the last one to grow up without her father.

It is what it is. It took me almost 2 1/2 years to get over it. And still, there will always be a certain pain that I cannot spend these beautiful, magical years with my daughter.

I love her so much. Every morning I get up and drive for 15 minutes to a special spot, where I can see the sunrise over the Atlantic ocean and dance with it because of the love for my daughter, my Sun…

And every month I make a 3 1/2 day pilgrimmage from the Algarve to Corinthia to see her for a couple of hours. I can already see how one day this will fuck up her expectations she has in men 😉

And her mother wants to be there, every single time. She thinks I don’t realise that she loves to see how much our daughter loves me the same way it touches me to see how much our daughter loves her.

And this is something so beautiful and intimate, that only the three of us can share.

And although, we still didn’t find a way to talk, there is so much love between the three of us when we are together.

You know, there is a special love, that only a father knows. It is the love that a father has for the mothers of his children. It is nothing like romantic love. It is the love for the person who enabled that unique gift of life and who nurishes that gift to grow to become that beautiful human.

In this respect, I will always love the mother of my child. And I love the moments we share together as a family and when we laugh together when our daughter says or does something sweet.

And I know that deep inside she loves me too. That’s why she hates me and is so shit scared to talk to me 😉

Three years…

vox