Dear Xenia Minou,

today is your fourth birthday. I remember very well the day and moment you were born and the beauty of the hours, days, weeks and month thereafter.

I love you so much!

You don’t know how much I do…

I’m so sorry, I cannot participate in your life as much I would like to.

And I always will… you are my sun!

Perhaps you will wonder if I loved you enough. Never question that… I do!

One day you will understand that people always try to do the best they can… and still often fail to do the right thing, although they should have known better.

The reason being, that we are conditioned to do and believe what we do and believe. And often the bond to our family is so strong that we keep repeating the stories and the trauma we experienced ourselves.

Jesus once said “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

And rather than repeating the trauma we experienced ourselves and passed on to you, transcend it. Be better than us rather than repeating it and by that understanding it to be able to forgive us.

I ask you, from the bottom of my heart, forgive your mother and me as we know not what we did. We were not conscious! Be conscious and forgive us without doing the same mistakes we did.

I love you my sun… koochooloo…