There is that fear that helps me survive. It is the type of fear that protects me from dangerous situations. Perhaps you can also call it my inner voice, my intuition.
But then there is destructive fear. This type of fear is fear that blurs my sight. It blurs my feelings, my perception.
It clouds my senses. It makes me think and do things that are destructive.
Sometimes this fear takes full control over me. And once I am controlled by it, it seems like there is nothing I can do about it.
This type of fear is tricky. It becomes like a vicious circle. It makes things worse… and then even worser.
I once I made an exercise looking at this type of fear. „What is your biggest fear?“ And then you ask yourself what happens if this fear takes full effect. You often get to the point where you realize that what you are afraid of is not that bad. However, it can also get to the point where it get’s bad… really bad…
What I realized doing that exercise was that what I was afraid of was what I actually did already create in my life. In a way my biggest fear initiated a self-fulfilling prophecy.
That’s the tricky bit about it. Although that fear might not be reality at first, eventually it will become reality, just because I allow it subconsciously to take over control.
The first step to conquer my fear is by acknowledging it. Then I go right into it. Because if I don’t do it, I am dead before death.
When people ask me about my take on spirituality I always give the same answer: Spirituality is not about angels and feel-good. Quite the opposite… on a deep level it’s the path along pain and fear!
Yeah, but there is also light… at the end of the tunnel.